What If

Two Thanksgiving dinners down, one to go. I am looking forward to traveling home to Phoenix this week. I just need to get away, plus it is all the closer to the time I will be able to quit my job and attend graduate school. Keeping my sanity has been difficult lately during the day to day grind, but I have been continuously reminding myself that I’m in the home stretch.

I haven’t really spent any time in the scene over the past two/three weeks. Not that there is a lack of things to do, just the opposite. There seems to be an endless plethora of lesbian events on a nightly basis. Like a friend had said to me this past weekend, you need to go out to luck out. Similar to the “Field of Dreams” quote “If you build it, they will come”. In our terms, the only way to possibly get lucky in love is to go out. Thus the reason there has been an absence of a female’s touch in my world.

I wanted to share a recent discussion I had with someone over parental rights. Imagine a three way sex-capade, involving a guy and two girls. Here is the scenario.. the guy has sex with one of the girls. That girl immediately rolls over and has sex with the other girl and somehow transfers the boy’s sperm into her, impregnating her. Highly doubtful that could actually happen but it’s simply a question of what if. Would the girl who technically impregnated the girl have any parental rights over that child? She was the conduit for transference, the middleman, the importer. What do you think?

Pre-Thanksgiving activity calendar:

APO on Tuesday night at Rockwell

The Betty on Wednesday at Fubar

Betty Tonight

Number 35

Check this out... Lesbiandating.net named Boxed Lunch as one of the 50 best lesbian dating websites, number 35 to be exact. I don't know, that's kind of cool right? Getting some sort of recognition. Find out who else ranked (my competition) at http://www.lesbiandating.net/blog/.

BoobyTrap is Back

Honestly, I didn't even know it went away. My bad. Nevertheless the girls are back with a vengeance. Dig your eyes on this party....

BoobyTrap is back in a big way! In an all new location. Join in on an evening of disco, dance-punk and funk, over-the-top-decadence and damsels straight out of the woodworks as they relaunch the legendary BT!

UH HUH HER'S very own Camila Grey and Leisha Hailey will be in the hizouse celebrating the release of Santa Le Roq's remix of their hit song "Explode".

There will be gift bags and party sway courtesy of Curve Magazine.

You must RSVP, no exceptions, at http://www.clubboobytrap.com/

The new location is at The Stone Bar... an old east Hollywood tranny bar that is being converted into pure chic-ery. There is a full 360 degree bar, a balcony over the dancefloor and a lounge area.

Curfew

Come party at Curfew and celebrate a birthday for ASHA - Club DJ

Cheap drinks, cheap food, kickin' music, friendly, and less mainstream. It starts late afternoon and ends mid evening, just perfect for those that have to work the next day. Curfew is all about fun, a time to relax and remind you what Sundays are about. Music lovers can expect the finest in cutting-edge music, never compromising, always delivering.

This is a free event but must RSVP for entry
RSVP: curfewla@gmail.com

1519 Griffith Park Blvd

Silverlake, CA 90026

Sunday, November 15th

3pm - 9pm
CASH BAR ONLY

Why God Why

I'm knocking on my head and no one's home. I need to start listening to myself when I decide to keep it easy. I attended the Love Unites event last night. They had an open vodka bar. The line was so long you had to ask for two and double fist. I even slipped him two bucks to make them extra strong. First mistake.

The party was a huge success. The organizers raised a shit load of money. Mingling among the crowd was Olivia Wilde, Daniela Sea and Jonathan Bennett. The moment I saw Olivia I thought to myself, Pisser would be pissing in her pants right now.

In addition to the open vodka bar there was a free tequila tasting table. The girl pouring, what would soon be the cause of my demise, was really cute. I should have just said no, but stupidly ingested a few sips. Second mistake.

We made some random friends. One was a girl with short hair, she kind of looked like a white Rhianna. My friend was trying to get me interested, but I kept insisting I like girls with long hair. Cut to fifteen minutes later and I'm like, alright I'll give it a go. When the party was over, I chose to go with these new acquaintances instead of home with my friends. Third mistake.

We walked over to SaddleRanch and I bought us a round of Irish Car Bombs. Fourth mistake. At this point I was a just a tag along. Apparently this girl wasn't even gay, because she kept on trying to hit on guys. Perhaps to throw me off the trail. Who knows. Next thing I realize is that we were at the Standard. I went to the bathroom and ditched them, then I grabbed a cab back to my friends place.

When I arrived I found them hanging out, allowing their drunkness to settle down. I was immediately tackled and force fed a piece of bacon. Fifth mistake. Ten minutes later I was head down in the toilet evacuating the contents of my stomach. I do have to admit, afterwards I felt a hell of a lot better. My friend was taking video of all the hilarity that was happening. I fear that video. It could quite possibly be blackmail material.

Girlbar 20th Anniversary

Celebrating 20 years of Girlbar this Friday! Join your hosts Robin Gans & Sandy Sachs for the 20th Anniversay.

Performing live... Kaylah Marin. Drink specials from 9-1030pm.

You don't want to miss a special performance by the hottest, sexist, most luscious Go-Go dancers in the country!

Featuring DJ Kimberly S and DJ Beau!

Don't forget about Midnight Madness! You call it, they pour it. Any single alcohol drink only $5!

Get on the guest list now. Go to http://www.girlbar.com/.

Free admission all night with your VIP card. Doors open at 9pm!!!

Love Unites

Be a part of a good cause! Plus.. OPEN BAR all night long!!! TEQUILA tasting!!! GIFT BAGS!!! LIVE DJs!!! SPECIAL PERFORMANCES and APPEARANCES!!!

Join the PARTY!!! BUY your TICKETS now!!! http://fallfairout.eventbright.com/

Sip cocktails, mingle with LA’s movers and shakers, and get a first hand look at celebrity-customized Shepard Fairey prints. Shepard will be on-hand to perform a special DJ set and ABSOLUT will keep the drinks flowing all night long!!!

8:00pm - 11:00pm
Andaz
8410 Sunset Blvd
West Hollywood, CA

Week Recap

I am alive and kicking, don’t worry. I just haven’t been feeling very literary lately. Last Wednesday I experienced the comedy show Gays R Us for the very first time. It was hosted by Erin Foley and the lesbian line-up included Erin Schauer, Liz Feldman and Dana Eagle. Although my life is constantly consumed with laughter, I am kind of tough on actual comics. It’s hard to make me laugh with a stand-up routine. I did cackle on several occasions however, especially when Dana Eagle was on stage. Throughout the night I kept thinking to myself, I could do this, I could create hilarity for a crowd.

Friday night I was very borderline whether to go out at all, but I did end up at Moonshadows briefly. Highlight of the night was seeing someone in an evil looking Mickey Mouse-like head rollerskating around the dance floor. Like I've always said, you never know what to expect at the Moon.

Saturday I sat on the sidelines as two dozen lesbians released their aggressions on the football field. I was in charge of dog watching. There were at least 6 injuries. Ridiculous! And you wonder why I refrain from entering the mayhem. I’ve got body parts that can pop.

Afterwards a hand full of gals went over to a friend’s house for a barbeque. It was low key and fun, although at times I felt like all I am is a big joke to people. That’s one of the curses of being so damn funny. I can’t help it if that’s how I mask my insecurities. I ducked out around 10ish, just as the couples in attendance started settling into a make-out corner.

At the end of the weekend I went to a friend’s birthday/house-warming party. I felt it was incredibly weird having a kegger on a Sunday evening. No way that was kicked by the end of the night. It was a pretty chill evening, chatting and sipping beers. I was home, in bed, by 11:30pm.

The Betty

Wednesday, November 4th
New location: Fubar